Learn how to grow an ever increasing earned secure attachment through attuning with one another. This course prepares us to love one another wisely by developing our attunement and attachment skills. Better understand God’s design as we become aware of how we have been relationally compromised and how to restore one another in love. Attuning builds the groundwork for close and safe relationships. A good relational attachment pattern enables us to heal from trauma and become emotionally mature.
Learn about “Secure Sally”. Due to knowing well that God is all He claims to be, Secure Sally has confidence as she goes through life. She is looking forward to the ‘adventures’ that are to come. Sally is not fearful of the mistakes she will make as she relates to her family, friends, co-workers, and others. She is not unnerved by the many things she must learn. She is a non-defensive and eager learner.
Learn about “Dismissive Danny”. Danny lives with a focus on following rules. Since he has not developed an inner confidence in handling hard situations, he feels a need to have clear guidelines to follow. This becomes more important to him than entering into the emotional pain or disturbances occurring with those he meets.
Learn about “Distracted David”. David has a strong desire to relate well and care about those in his life. Whichever person or event is the most demanding is the one that grabs his attention. He lives with ‘the squeaky wheel gets the oil” syndrome. People do know they are important to him when a crisis occurs, but if nothing urgent is being presented to David, they may not know his true response.
Learn about “Disorganized Debbie”. At first, Debbie appears to be a stable, reliable and responsible colleague. This is the case until difficult situations arise and she emotionally disintegrates. As time goes on, Debbie’s life is increasingly characterized by emotional outbursts and chaos. It seems like she has an internal magnet to fearful situations, as she is constantly in the middle of whatever crisis is at hand. In situations that are threatening to her, she is unable to gain realistic perspective, bringing herself to a sense of calm.
Repairs. Most of us did not start out with strong “Earned Secure”. What do we need to grow this pattern? Understand your life story and how it has impacted how you are today. Self-Awareness & Reflection are the most powerful way to a Secure Attachment.
Maribeth Poole is a pastoral care minister. She is ordained through Vineyard Christian Fellowship of Wichita Kansas. Maribeth counseled 15 years for Shepherd’s House. During her years of practice she co-authored the book The Life Model: Living from the Heart Jesus Gave You and Bringing the Life Model to Life Study Guide. She wrote a guide for new parents to help them joyfully develop the mind of their baby called Joyful Beginnings Baby Book Guide. Maribeth’s holistic ministry approach is centered in God’s design for our brains and His Word concerning relationships. She covers current and past trauma, relationships, spirituality and the emotional maturity process. Maribeth has specialized training in brain development and healing the effects of sexual abuse, dissociation, ritual abuse and church relationships. Maribeth was born in Nigeria to missionary parents. She attended a missionary boarding school through 9th grade finishing High School in the U.S. She has a BS degree from Columbia Bible College and her masters in Biblical Counseling from Grace Theological Seminary. She likes people, animals, nature and reading. Maribeth’s heart is easily captured by the wounded, overlooked and those mis-perceived as unimportant or misfits. She enjoys watching God tenderly and powerfully help people through recovery.